american-english

So I’m at a party and this gorgeous man walks in. It was in slow motion, backlight, wind machine, “Dreamweaver” was playing, the whole nine yards.

Scene 1: Act 1
{the dining room table, I am frosting cupcakes, he is eating appetizers}

Hot Guy at Party: I should eat this hummous, it’s like my only source of protein.
Me: Really? Are you a virgin?
*silence*
Me: Oh my god, I meant vegetarian…